Already There
by ChelseaMarieC
Summary: A Colifer fiction. I just think that what if they had met and not even knew that they'd be working together? An AU. I just think that Jen and Colin are so cute and I love them, and I'm not afraid to say that I sort of ship them. If he wasn't married... That's why I wrote this, so I can ship them and not feel guilty. Ok, let me know what you think and leave comments, I love them.
1. Chapter 1

**Already There**

Part 1

I didn't mean for this to happen, actually the whole thing scares me. It's easy to play a character when you seem like you are one with them. That's how it all happened, how I ended up here. I'm sitting across from him, already dreading the words to come. The papers in my hands are moist from the nervous sweat that's soaked into them. I feel my cheeks burn, knowing that they are red. My eyes try to look anywhere but at him. I can't seem to find the words, even though they are right in my hands. I can't see them, I can't understand them. It's like I've forgotten how to read. This is ridiculous, I keep repeating that inside my head, hoping the thought will spontaneously take root. But they need me to make a move, he is waiting, stunned I'm sure. This wasn't what I thought it'd feel like, like everything I've ever known- suddenly doesn't make sense. But that's where I am.

"OK, it's on all on you." His words are just a whisper but it feels like he is screaming them at me. I blame him, his blue eyes, his accent, his charm, it's all his fault that I'm in love with him.

Adam speaks. "You are in love with him. Act as if you have finally realized that you are deep in love with him. You've got this Jen."

He's right. But I don't have to act as though I'm in love with him. I'm already there.

It all started three weeks before. I was on a break from filming and just doing a quick jog. Like any normal person, I needed to get a drink after awhile. I didn't want to be long so I just went to the convenience store that I had gone before. They knew me there and I wasn't hounded by fans or paparazzi. I was sweaty, in a little tank top and jacket. My yoga pants weren't keeping me as warm as I would have liked to be but oh well. My hair swung back and forth in its ponytail and my iPod slipped easily back into my jacket pocket. I quickly went to the cooler and grabbed my water. I paid for it, I know boring but the next part is important.

As I was leaving, I tripped on a crack in the sidewalk and my water bottle went flying and into a man. I immediately forced myself up, knowing that the rip in my yoga pants probably also lead to a cut. But I had to find out who I hit. Of course, who I hit didn't mind in the least. I watched him rub his face and laugh. I was too shocked. My eyes were wide with horror that I had caused him to have a mental break. But he genuinely didn't mind.

"I'm so sorry. Are you ok? I tripped. I didn't mean, oh tell me you are fine." I looked at him and watched him bend down and hand me my water bottle back.

"I'm fine. But you're not." He pointed to my ripped pants. I looked to where he pointed and saw a red patch of bleeding skin.

"I'm fine. But I'm just glad that I didn't hurt you. How's your face?" I reached over and cupped the side of his cheek. His beard stubble tickled my hand and I fought the giggle in my throat. He was so handsome and when I finally had the courage to look into his eyes, I smiled. He had the deepest blue eyes that I had ever seen. They were like an ocean filled with little sirens that called me in. His hair was jet black but in the light it shined with a gold hue, as if he actually emitted a light from him. His smile back at me was what made me feel tense and weak at the same time. I dropped my hand from his face, suddenly realizing that I was acting too personal.

"Name's Colin. Yours?" He held out his hand and I quickly slid mine in.

"Jennifer, call me Jen." His Irish accent sure didn't make it easier to hide the blush from my cheeks. But my hand fit perfectly in his and went he gently squeezed it, my heart screamed.

"Want me to take a look at that?" He lets go of my hand and points once more to my cut.

"I guess. It's really fine. I hurt myself more during filming." I laugh it off and play with my zipper jacket. I am suddenly warm enough to not need my jacket. I unzip it and slide it off and tie it around my waist.

"Filming?" He says it surprised actually. He lightly chuckles.

"What? I don't look like an actress to you?" I have no makeup on, my ponytail is falling apart, and I'm all sweaty. I become very self aware and I can't look at him anymore. I look away and kick at the sidewalk.

"It's not that. I just, I'm surprised is all. You seem very down to earth." He crosses his arms against his plaid shirt and I see his muscles flex. I bite my lip.

"Not all actresses are divas. Duh." I laugh at myself and when I see him smile again, I can't hide the dopey grin from taking over my lips.

"So, let's sit." He points to the Starbucks down the street and I instantly shake my head. "What? Not a fan?" He lightly laughs and looks down. I smile at him while he looks away.

"Not that. I just am not in the mood." The last thing I want to do is get recognized and ruin what we have started. "Let's go for a walk." I begin to walk but all of a sudden, a sharp pain shoots through my leg as I begin to take a step.

"How about we don't, you really need that cleaned and bandaged up. Come on," he picks me up and carries me over to the nearest bench. When he lifts me up, I'm nervous at first but I have never felt more safe than being in his arms. I'm a little breathless but I don't let on. I try to keep a straight face while he continues to smile at me. He holds up one finger then walks away.

I watch as he goes back into the convenience store and a couple minutes later, emerges with first aid supplies. I laugh as he goes to work and I just watch his strong but gentle hands bandage me up. He is so sweet and suddenly, I'm not as nervous to look at him. We first lightly talk about accidents that have happened to us then soon, we are opening up about a lot of things.

"So, you played a doctor yet you can't fix yourself up?" He laughs then reaches over to tap my wound, which is all disinfected and properly bandaged thanks to him.

"Maybe I just wanted you to take care of me." I flash him a quick and sly grin. He reaches over and takes my hand in his. It fits perfectly. I weave my fingers with his and grin even wider at him. I know I'm blushing but I don't mind him seeing.

"So Jen, what do you do for fun?"

"I can show you better than I can tell you." I laugh and get up. I take a couple careful steps and know that running, or walking for that matter are out of the question. Problem is, I didn't drive, I just ran straight from my house.

"Doubt you can show me anything while you're injured love." I turn back and watch him carry a show-off grin. I smack him lightly. "Beating me up? Want to doctor me up there?" He laughs once more and I know, I know right there, that he is going to be trouble.

"I ran here. So, what do you want to do?" I nervously play with my bottled water and watch his eyebrows rise up and down. It has to be a nervous thing but I can't help but find it utterly adorable.

"We can go back to your place, let you change, then grab lunch." He looks at me seriously and I know by the depth in his eyes, that he is being vulnerable with me. Normally, this is where I run, I decline and imply that I hardly know him, that this is too sudden, that I'm not sure I can do this. But his oceans call me and ask me to not be afraid. I can't fight their siren call but I don't think I'd even want to.

"Ok." It was one word, a breathless word. But it carried the heaviest weight for me because, I let him in. I let him see me. I'm opening up to him and that scares the hell out of me. Do I deny everything and find a way out? These are things that have stopped me in the past, stopped me from ever getting too close. But here I am, defying all my odds. And I know he is more than worth it. I can see us going somewhere, this is going somewhere.

"Good. If I am not mistaken, I'd say you are falling for me Ms. Morrison." He smiles but he is still so serious. I get nervous but return the smile, fear in my eyes. "I know I have." He looks away and rubs his chin. "Maybe I shouldn't have said that. But I," he stops, he is surely waiting for me to say something.

I don't have the words. But I feel the same way, I'm already there. I've already fallen for him. Do I say yeah me too? No, he is nervous. He's waiting for me. Damnit Jen, say something, anything. Why can't I say something? What do I do.

"Or maybe I was misreading things." He is covering up his words. This is not what I wanted to happen. Shoot. "Or… I don't know. Say something." He whispers it to me but I know I have to do the one thing that scares me more than anything. I have to show him. To not be afraid, and free fall into him.

I take a deep breath and nod. I grab him by his neck, my arms wrapping around him, his arms wrap around my waist. I look into his eyes, those reckoning eyes, and I nod. I don't stop myself from gently kissing him. I ignore everything around me, I give all of myself to him. I kiss him sweet and careful at first but I soon can't stop myself from demanding more. I pull on him more, bringing his body closer to me, needing more. I have an opening hunger for him and I don't think just this can fulfill me. I can't stop. He tastes so sweet and faintly of spiced cinnamon. When I finally get the courage to pull away from him, I look at him, nervous.

"I'm, I just didn't know what to say." I let him go and take a step back, forcing his arms to fall from around me.

"When you said you can show me better than you can tell me, I had no idea." He lightly chuckles but takes a giant step closer to me. He grabs me again and just holds me. "I refuse to ever let you go Jen." Then his lips quickly peck mine.

"I second that." I lightly laugh and know, I know that I can't turn back. The cliff looked so uncertain at first but the bottom doesn't seem as scary as I first though it'd be. I jumped. He had no idea how much I fell for him. Truth was, I didn't even know.

I never knew that letting go-truly falling- meant giving parts of yourself away. I had to relinquish control of my heart to him and that took all of my strength and courage. I can't fake these things. I never had this feeling inside of me, burning me straight to my core, traveling all throughout me, and swallowing my heart whole. If I knew all these things before, would I have continued to fall?

I'm still sitting across from him, his face is daring and begging me to keep it all quiet. The sheets finally come into focus. I smile and nod at him, I can talk again. I can do this. Separate things from work and personal, I can do this. I take one last look into his eyes and know that just because we are stuck here, that doesn't take back those three weeks. The best three weeks of my entire existence. His eyes call me out to sea and I easily respond.

"I can do that. I'm there." I smile at Adam and Eddy and fold back a page. I gently lean in and whisper, "heaven knows I'm already there." He returns my smile and we begin, again.

**Ok, so I got this idea and had to write it. My friends and followers on Instagram encouraged me so thank you. Here it is. Follow me on Instagram if you'd like castleofstorybrooke **


	2. Chapter 2

Part 2

I'm nervous when he pulls up to my house, to say that I'm nervous actually is an understatement. I want to completely let all my fear go, but that is just unrealistic. So instead of hiding myself, I show him who I really am. I nervously bite my lip and try to cool the fever in my cheeks. I nod and proceed to get out of his car. He doesn't say anything at all when he comes around to me. He locks the car without muttering anything, barely a breath is all I get.

"So, what do you think?" I'm hoping he isn't judging my garden, sure I only have yellow flowers planted and all but that's what I like to look at. And sure they are all over the place but I think it looks quite lovely. My house is an ocean blue color, it was actually supposed to be yellow but I wanted my flowers so I had to pick blue. Ginny actually helped me pick out the color. It's small but then again, it's only me and Ava. Sorry Ava is my dog. But I love my home and suddenly I realize, I really want him to like it too. Why does his opinion matter so much to me?

"It's truly lovely. Quite like you." He turns to me finally and smiles. "I actually love it." He is blushing now and I instantly feel relief wash over me.

"I was honestly worried you'd hate it. I was quite worried actually. I don't why I care so much, I mean you matter to me and all but…" I try to shut up, I know my ramblings can get me into trouble and all but now I feel so childish and like a crazed fan of his. I shake my head and look away.

"You matter to me. And I surely doubt I could hate anything of yours. Mind showing me more?" He grabs my hand and I swell inside.

"Yeah, come on." I lead him up the steps and slowly inside. The minute I step in, Ava runs up to me. I bend down to greet her. "Hey baby." I kiss her head and pick her up. "Ava, meet Colin. He's important Ava so be nice." I know I'm blushing and I don't even care.

"Nice to meet you Ava." She practically leaps into his open arms. "I think she likes me."

"You charmed her too. Maybe you just charm any female." I laugh as does he. "She is quite a fan." I watch them meet and I fall harder. He is just so good with her that I'm shocked. Ava is a really good judge of character, something I'm not as good at. She trusts him and that's enough for me. The reason I am so nervous and doubting every aspect of my life and all is because I have been burned before. That doesn't stop me from opening up and all because one of these days, it will surely pay off. But I look past those red flags and trudge forward. I want to be there so badly and see the good in them to a fault actually.

"I'm a fan of hers too." He loves on her once more but she is called away.

"Ava? Where did you go?" Ginny's voice carries through to the foyer and suddenly I panic. I actually forgot that she was watching Ava for me. She steps out from the hallway and stops once she sees him. She is at first surprised and I smack my head, how could I have forgotten about her being here? "Hello."

Colin steps from behind me and I feel as if I've been caught trying to sneak a boy into my room by my mother. He smiles quite proudly and his arm briefly and purposely, skims along my arm. He steps forward and grabs Ginny's hand.

"I'm Colin." He shakes her hand then steps closer to me once more.

"I'm Ginnifer. Nice to meet you Colin. Hey Jenny, mind coming to help me get something out of the kitchen?" Ginnifer waved me on and I knew that I had no choice.

"Sure," I turn back to Colin and smile, I mean he isn't stupid, he knows we are going to go talk about him and yet, he holds himself with such confidence that I know why I fell so easily for him. He reassures me that for once, I actually got it right, my heart and mind chose him and I am so glad I didn't have to choose between one or the other, they were on the same page. "Mind?"

"Not at all." He smiles and raises his brow and rubs his stubble. "I'll just go ahead and…" He motions to my living room where Ava sits happily, waiting for company.

"Sure, yeah, go ahead and make yourself comfortable. Watch TV, do whatever you want." I shut myself up before I make more of a fool of myself.

He nods and smiles once more at me and just as I quickly look back, he winks at me. I know that, that wink was meant for only me and I only smile in return. I feel so sure of myself when I'm with him, or looking at him, or just when I am thinking of him that I'm not even worried about blushing.

"Jen…" Ginny calls me back and it forces me to pull my eyes away from him. She waves me on and I force myself to follow her. "Ok, tell me who the hell is mister yummy and why am I just meeting him now? I mean you invited him in! He has to be super special and all to come back here. And did you see Ava with him? I mean she absolutely loved him!" She shakes her head. "Sorry to overwhelm you and all but… Jen, come on. How come you didn't tell me?"

"Because I just met him today and before you get all 'Jen you do this kind of thing every time and all, you are wrong, remember you told me to remind you of these things' and all, it's different. I'm different with him. And I honestly wanted to know him better before I introduced him to my best friends. And you can't tell Josh, he will be all judgmental and make him uncomfortable. And yes, I know that it's all really sudden but, Ginny, when I kissed him…" I let my eyes close and daydream of his lips on mine.

"Wait, you kissed him already? This is too soon but I agree. Something is different about him." She looks me over with a stern look and I stop mid-daydream and shake my head.

"What?"

"Something is different about you." She walks around me and taps her chin as she does so, as if she knows everything and I suddenly know nothing. "You're hurt." She drops to the floor and looks at my knee. She runs her finger over the bandage and looks back at me. "What happened? Are you ok?"

"It's a story. But before he worries, you think we should go back out there?" I step away and smile, suddenly eager to go back and be with him. I don't even attempt to shake away the giddy feeling that creeps back into my stomach at the thought of being with him.

"Sure. But tonight, after he leaves," and she looks very serious at me with her hands on her hips, "I will be coming back here and spending the night. Then you can tell me everything. Got it?"

"Deal." I hold my hands up in surrender and go to head back into the living room. She follows quickly behind me. "Wait," I stop her before she goes any further, "shouldn't you bring something back as if we had been working on something and not just discussing him?"

"Right. Ok, go out there and I'll be there in a minute." Ginny rushes back into the kitchen and I quickly walk back to the living room.

"Hope you didn't miss me." I slide around the couch and sit right next to him. Ava is laying in his lap and he was busy playing with my stereo.

"Maybe just a little." He ruffles Ava then lets her go and walks over to my record player. "Quite a collection you have going here." He starts to thumb through my albums and I can't look away from him.

"Not as much as I'd like to have. Find anything you like?" I ruffle Ava then slide away from her and slide up beside him.

"Maybe." He leans in and whispers so close to my ear that his breath actually tickles me. "I haven't really listened to much of Lana Del Rey so…" He pulls away as a light chuckles escapes his lips but barely registers.

"You should." I playfully shove him and I just can't help myself from staring at him.

"Maybe you can play something for me?" He hands me her record of Born To Die and I nod my head. I slide her record out and I can feel him watching me. I know exactly which song I want to play for him. "Dark Paradise" comes on and I instantly sway. "This is one of my favorites."

He nods his head and gently sways with me. I can feel him getting into it and he smiles to himself as he closes his eyes. "I can see why you like it."

"No one compares to you, I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side…" her voice leaves those lyrics hanging in the air and I know that suddenly this is how I feel. I know that I can relate. No one has ever made me feel this way, no one but him.

"Care to dance?" He grabs my hand in his and wraps his arms around my waist. He doesn't leave me a choice. He gently sways me and I wince. "Oh, sorry, I forgot about your leg."

"No, it's okay." But he shakes his head at me. I just stare in awe at him. He lifts me up and places me on his feet. He continues to dance with me, slowly even when "Radio" comes on. It has a faster beat but he still sways with me. I gently lean my head on his shoulder and I just smile to myself. I know I'm not daydreaming.

"Jen, you with us?" Adam's voice pulls me away. I look at him and he looks frazzled.

"Sorry. Yeah I'm with you." I pull away from him and nervously look at my script. I flip to the next page and smile. This is where I realize that I'm vulnerable with Hook. The beanstalk was just the start. I look up at him and he is smiling. I know that when I look in his eyes, everything will be fine again. And they are.

"Aye love." He looks at me after he says that and I nod. We can do this, I say with my eyes. He nods, like he knows what I'm talking about.

I am sorry for these flashbacks but everything makes sense as I look back. I see things differently. And I like what I see. Dancing with him was safe. That's what I felt, utterly safe in his arms. I loved that feeling. And I wish to always feel like that. So that's the emotion I bring to Emma, how Colin made me feel like that, that's how I have to act with Hook, no worries. I just can't show my card to Eddie and Adam. No one must know. Well except Ginny and Josh.

Ginnifer comes back in and stops herself. "Oh, sorry, I don't mean to interrupt." She nervously begins to retreat.

"No worries." He lifts me up and off his feet. "Song is over anyway."

"Yeah." I turn the music off but he leans back to me and whispers in my ear.

"For now." His breath once again tickles my neck and I shiver. His hand gently runs across my back before he walks completely away.

I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding and gather myself before turning back to the tray of drinks and cookies Ginny brought with her. "Thanks Ginny, this looks great." I join Ava on my chair, safely away from Colin. I shove a cookie in my mouth and hope that my face doesn't betray my calm nature again.

She smiles and turns her full attention to Colin. "So, where did you come from?" She nibbles her cookie and acts like she didn't say anything wrong at all.

"I actually came here for a potential job." He bites into the cookie and shakes his head. "Good job."

I catch her blush and I know that she likes him too. "Where are you staying?"

"In a hotel, not too far from where we met Jen." Him saying my name pulls me back, his voice can always do that for me.

"Jen. I think we did good." Colin says it so effortlessly and rises from his seat.

"I think you two have perfect chemistry." Adam and Eddie smile at us then at each other. "Colin, you got the part."

I nervously and happily look at Colin. I honestly don't know what to say. What does this mean for us? What do we do about those three weeks? Do they just not matter anymore? I can't get a grip on what I am exactly feeling anymore. I just know that if I don't get away right now, I might go into a panic attack.

"This is great news. Right Jen?" Colin is so happy and as much as I'd love to celebrate in the good news, I can't. I feel fear and panic rise within my chest and as much as I don't want to, I know I'm going to run.

I go to take a step but someone's arm jerks me back. I can't help but be turned back and pulled very close to Colin's body. His grip on me isn't tight and it doesn't scare me. He gently lets go of my arm when he can sense that I'm not going to run.

"We aren't over. This changes nothing." It's those words. It's like the minute I hear them, my panic begins to cease. I hate how he makes me need him, I hate that he knows me so well after only three weeks. I hate that he can bring me back down but no one, not even myself, I can't do that. But what I hate most is, I hate how much I love him. I hate it. I hate how I know I can't be without him. I hate and love him for that. I know I can't back away, no matter what. I ignore the looks from everyone else and I grab him into a hug. When I'm sure no one else can hear me, I whisper in his ear.

"I hate you."

He lightly laughs, "I love you too Jen." I don't let him see me smile.


	3. Chapter 3

Part 3

We grab lunch after the reading and at first I'm worried someone will see but it's not like they won't be able to figure it out eventually so why bother with small things? He takes my hand and I don't fight it. I smile at him and can't help but feel as if I'm seventeen all over again. That first time love you know? But that's exactly how he makes me feel. I'm experiencing the ins and outs of love all over again. His hand is warm in mine and I know I'm blushing. He picks the small café not too far from set and right now, no one knows who he is, or who he is going to be. So paparazzi isn't one of my worries at the moment. He orders for me and the whole time, I can't tear my eyes away from him.

"You need to find something else to do with those sparkling eyes other than stare at me." He doesn't look at me when he says it but just smiles to himself.

"But that's all I want to do. Don't you have a hard time tearing your eyes away from me?" I shake his hand in mine and actually startle as he yanks me to him and grips me closer and leans in.

I'm not a fan of PDA but right now, everything is different. All I can see is his lips and how close they are to mine, my heart picks up its pace and I think for sure he is going to grab me and plant one on me, I'm actually craving it.

"Now if I didn't, I'd be sure to cause a commotion. So yes I do but I have no choice love." And then he simply kisses my forehead. His lips are cool to the touch and I let out my breath on his soft neck. He still grips my hand in his and then sneaks looks at me.

And why we wait for our order, I don't mind not talking. Just being near him is enough. Words aren't needed with him. And that's one of the reasons why I know he is something special. Not needing words at all is always something I've fantasized about. The quiet moments that speak volumes and yet the silence couldn't be any louder? To me, that's just the perfect thing in a relationship, being so completely satisfied just in each other's presence.

"Here you two go. Wait a minute, you look familiar." The waitress is smiling at me and pointing at me. She is thinking hard and I have a flutter of panic.

"Aye, yes. This is my girlfriend. Maybe that's how you know her." Colin laughs and we walk out and head to the farthest table outside, tray in his hands. Then, the minute we are out of ear shot, we both burst out laughing.

"Ha-ha. She probably thinks that we are insane. I can't believe you did that." I sit down and he pushes in my chair. "What if she takes a picture of us or something?"

"Oh relax. I'm no one right now so don't even worry." He hands me my Styrofoam box and drink and opens his box up.

"Colin, now you know that's not true. You are someone to me." I say it so sweetly and corny sounding that even I chuckle. I reach over and place my hand on his arm and he turns to me and sticks his tongue out at me. "Boyfriend." I smile and nod. "I like the way that sounds."

"As do I. Come here." He leans in and quickly pecks my lips. "Now we both know, that after that night at your house, we were already boyfriend and girlfriend whether we said it or not."

"A hotel? Hmm." Ginny takes another bite out of her cookie and sips her tea. She doesn't do anything but look at me with her eyebrows raised. I shake my head at her and all during this quiet exchange, Colin just looks at us, confusion in his eyes.

"Am I missing something?" His voice is so calm and I can't help but nervously blush once more, the heat traveling into my cheeks and betraying me yet again.

"No, not at all. Other than that hotel, if it's the one I'm thinking of, is very infamous for us both." Ginny smiles to herself, proud to admit something like that. She takes another sip of tea and beams at me, her cheeks chubby and cute as ever.

I choke on my cookie and hurriedly take a drink. Sure that hotel was something for us both. It's where I met with the Mad Hatter, where Ginny met with Prince Charming. Only her meetings turned out for the better. I don't want to diminish my relationship, we had more than that. It just didn't last for the long haul. No bitterness left. But I still can't believe she would do something like that to me. I look down the minute Colin looks at me. Suddenly my workout clothes are too tight and I feel as if they are squeezing the life out of me.

"What?" He looks at me, surely wanting answers and I don't know how to be adult about all of this. I need to tell him it wasn't just a tryst, that I'm not about that but I don't get a chance.

"See, Jen and I were dating and so no one would know about us, we would meet at the hotel and be in love. Other than that, we were single. Work can complicate things." Ginny finished her tea and looked from me to Colin. "I'm going to get more tea. Anyone?"

We both shake our heads no and she leaves. I don't know what to say. I want to tell him that it was a little while ago, wounds can still be fresh, that it didn't end bitterly, nothing lost, and that with him, I know it's different. And all the things I want to say just doesn't come. I want to tell him that I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps around, that it has to mean something. His eyes are asking all these things of me and all I can manage to do is utter an "I'm sorry".

"For what? Having an amazing friend? Jen," He comes over to my chair and kneels in front of me, grasps both of my hands in his, and smiles, "You can't scare me away that easily. Besides, I didn't expect you to not have loved before me. I have loved before you too." He shakes my hands in his and smiles up at me. His eyebrows wiggle and he gets me to laugh. He leans up and slowly kisses me. My hands are still in his and I fight to touch his skin. His lips gently tug and taste mine, his tongue fighting through the barrier. The minute he lets go of my hands, I run my hands through his hair, grabbing a tiny chunk between my fingers. I don't want to let go but I can feel him tugging away. So I relent.

"Sorry." I smile and lick my lips, they taste like cinnamon. I lick once more and stop worrying about my obsessive blushing. "But honestly, she is only telling you all this to test you, so far you're beyond passing." I grab his hands back in mine and he begins to rub circles along the back of my hand. "So, what are we doing?"

"Honestly?" I nod. "I think we're falling in love." He kisses me quickly once more and I can hear Ginny clear her throat. I don't tear my eyes away from him just yet. He smiles and wiggles his eyebrows once more.

He gets up and turns to Ginny. "Want to grill me? Ask me anything." He nods his head and sets his jaw. All she can do is nod and smile, teeth showing in the bright light.

"Well played Colin." She turns to me and blows me a kiss. "You did good here Jenny."

I just nod and continue to smile at him. "I think I'm gonna get changed into something more comfortable." I quickly run upstairs and no sooner the second I leave, Ginnifer opens her mouth.

"So, any ex-wives or crazy exes?"

I just shake my head and continue on my way up. I get to my closet and suddenly nothing looks good enough. I shake my head at all my dresses, that's too much. Ava comes in and sits on my feet. "What should I wear?" I flip past my fancier clothes and only get frustrated. I don't want it to look like I'm trying too hard. I close my eyes and grab the next thing my hand lands on. It's a dress. A yellow one with black polka dots. I actually wore it for a photo shoot. "Ok. Deal."

I examine myself in the mirror and actually love it. I let my hair down and brush it out, hoping I can keep the natural wave in. I slide in a black headband and nod. "I can do this." I take a deep breath and with Ava hot on my heels, I head back downstairs. I hear laughing and that only causes me to pick up my speed.

"Shut up! That's not even true! She would love that." Ginny is gripping her stomach and lightly slapping his arm.

"Did I miss something?" I enter and the minute he turns to me, he stops mid-laugh and just stares at me with wonder in his eyes. He doesn't say a thing and I nervously look down. I finally walk all the way into the living room and when I pass him, I can feel him drinking in my bare legs.

"Just some lame jokes." Ginny smiles at me. "Looking cute."

But I barely hear her, I can't look anywhere but at Colin, I'm watching him look me over and I honestly don't think he knew just what he was getting into. He continues to stare, mouth agape, pure astonishment in his eyes. My heart flutters and I don't look away. But I know my cheeks are a burning red for him. I feel my eyes glisten and he finally clears his throat.

"Jen, well you look just positively, wow." He shakes his head and I know how he feels. I lost the words when I saw him too.

"Can't think straight?" I laugh it off to lighten the moment but he just mouths back "no". I don't know what else to say, but thank goodness Ginny was there… Or not.

"Maybe I should go and check on Josh. Jen, I'll see you tonight?"

"Yep." I continue to stare at Colin.

"Colin?" He pulls away from me to look at her. "It was nice meeting you. I hope to see more of you real soon."

"As do I." He gets up and hugs her. "And I hope to meet the man brave enough to steal your heart." He bows and she laughs.

"Oh you are too good. He is going to love you. Bye you two." She blows me a kiss and I give one back.

He turns to me and smiles. "What now?"

"Twenty questions?" I shrug not sure how else to get to know each other so quickly.

"After one thing." He looks around and I follow where he looks. "I need to tell you what you do to me in that dress. Or better yet, I'll take a page from your book. I'll show you." He heads over to my records once more and flips through them. He smiles when he grabs my Ella Henderson one, which is brand new. I have only listened to a couple of songs. He immediately puts on my favorite, "Yours."

"This is my favorite." I smile and watch him slowly make his way to me. He extends his hand and mine fits so perfectly into it that I just can't show any other emotion other than to just simply smile.

"May I have this dance?" He looks at me, with moisture in his eyes and he easily pulls me up and into his open arms.

The words begin to play and I can't help but fill with tears. They silently begin to fall and he swipes under my cheeks. This song instantly takes over how I feel. It is how I feel about him, and it's everything I can't say or am too nervous to say. It's how I want the future to sound. How I want the rest of my days to play out. It's the words I don't have. It's the words my heart whispers. It's us. I rest my head on his shoulder, my right hand in his left, his other hand resting on my backside.

"And I would fight my strength to untape my mouth. When I used to be afraid of the words. But with you I've learnt just to let it out. Now my heart is ready to burst. Cause I, I feel like I'm ready for love. And I, I wanna be your everything and more. And I know every day I say it. But I just want you to be sure. That I am yours."

I know the minute I am in his arms, feeling so safe, that this is our song. That this is everything for us. That this is how he makes me feel.

"Jen?" He pulls away from me, his eyes burning holes into mine. "I…"

"I know. I feel this way too." And we seal ourselves with a kiss.

And now, looking at him, eating across from me, those words float back into my mind. I replay the song for us to dance to every now and then. But he said it. He said I'm his. And as those words play on, I look at the man my heart fell for. The man I've chosen to love. Not that I had much of a choice but if I did, I'd still choose him. I don't have to worry about keeping things back. I let him see everything and I let him in completely and while that thought is still so scary, I know I would never change a thing. I'm sure. He doesn't see me as I mouth the words, "And I'm yours".

**Honestly please go and listen to this song and tell me it doesn't scream Captain Swan. But I had to use it for this story because the moment fit. Leave comments on what you thought. "Yours" by Ella Henderson, she is AMAZING! **


	4. Chapter 4

Part 4

"Maybe I should go now." His hands fall away from me and I don't want to sound desperate and all but that's the last thing I want him to do.

"We could watch something on TV. Maybe, if you want to." I bite my lip and try to keep desperation out of my voice and I try not to blush. He is doing this all to me, making me need him more than I've ever needed anyone before. And instead of scaring me to the point of running away, I find myself fighting to run to him.

He smiles and rubs his lips. Those very red and kissable lips, the lips I need and crave, the lips that make me feel things and think things. He just lightly laughs and I don't know what he is thinking, I need to know.

"What? I didn't mean to sound desperate, I don't want to scare you away." I turn away from him and slump down on my couch, Ava comes over as if she knows I need someone.

"You aren't desperate. I would love to stay here and never leave. But I did just arrive a little while ago and I have a lot to prepare for. Want to come with me?" He sits down next to me and I look at the clock. "Or do you have something else you need to do?"

I have another reading with another guy they are trying out for the character of Hook but that seems so unimportant at the moment and I want to lie and say no but I nod.

"I have this reading to go to. But maybe later?" I instinctively wrap my hand in his and he doesn't react, just goes along with it as if that's the most natural thing in the world.

"I thought you made plans with your friend. How about tomorrow morning?" He continues to hold my hand in his and I sigh heavily and fall back into the couch. My dress slides a little up my legs and I don't feel self conscious enough to fix it.

"Ugh. I don't want you to leave but it seems that is the only thing that we can do." His fingers graze my bare knee and stop and begin making circles on my thighs. It sends shivers down my back but in the good way. My stomach rumbles and stirs and my heart flutters. My cheeks burn and I want him in the worst way. I let him continue to do that until I close my eyes and sigh.

"But maybe tomorrow, I don't leave." I know what he means by that and I freak.

"I'm not, I'm not about that and I just…" I get flustered and can't help but react. My hand drops from his, he pulls his fingers off my skin too quickly. He slides back, hands in the air. His eyes are shocked and I don't know what just happened to me. I want it that way but I can't be too easy.

"I wasn't referring that. Calm down." He lowers his hands and quickly smirks. "I was simply wondering if I could stay here instead of a hotel. I mean it's a nice one and all but… that's up to you."

"Yes! Get your bags and bring them tomorrow morning. I have a guest room." I smile all too happily and fall into him. I wrap my arms around him and his arms wrapped around me. The minute his body was pressed into mine, I grew warm. He made everything make sense and everything that much better. And whenever I was in his arms, I felt untouchable, safe from everything and anything in the entire world. I felt that no one else could make me feel the way he did. He made me feel as if I was the only one he saw, the only one he would ever see, the only one who mattered.

"Good. Tomorrow morning." He whispered in my ear and I sighed into his ear. "Good to know that you agree."

"Ha, good one." I pushed back and when our faces were close together, I couldn't help it, I pulled him in for a kiss. His lips were intoxicating and I didn't want to stop. His lips were soft and gentle but he kissed with urgency and I returned the need. My hands wove around his neck and his hands played with my waistline. His fingers burned my skin through the fabric of my dress. I needed a little more. I pushed into him. Sending him to half lay into my couch as I leaned onto him.

His hands traveled along my bare legs and I felt such heat that I knew that my skin was already a soft pink color. His hands edged at the hem of my dress but stayed right there. And I was thankful. He was a true gentleman, the kind I read about, the kind I used to dream about as a little girl. My own Prince Charming. My hands played with his hair then I couldn't stop myself from pulling on his shirt collar in an urgency to get him closer to me. Any closer and it would require less clothing. But I wasn't nervous or even hesitant, I knew what I was feeling. And what I was feeling wasn't a mistake. It was the strongest and most intense and real feeling I've ever known.

"Mmmmm, Jen?" His lips slowly pulled away from mine and I leaned in needing one more little peck of his lips. I gently kissed him, forcing myself to pull away. I let go of his collar but his hands still rested on my hips.

"Yeah?" I was near breathless and I just wanted to resume where we left off. But I don't know if I can do that without being able to stop myself, I couldn't. He had to stop me from advancing and I respect him for knowing that, that was what I wanted.

"I think I should really get going, especially if I'm moving in tomorrow and I know, not like that. But we can definitely resume this tomorrow." His smirk and raised brows stirred something in me.

"You're right. Sorry." I pull myself off of him and climbed back onto my side of the couch. He stretched forward and laughed. "What?"

"I just find it cute that you are apologizing for attacking me." He shook his head then rubbed his lips.

"I did not attack you! You weren't exactly stopping me either." I laugh then cross my arms in front of my chest.

"Yes you did. I was just kissing you when you leapt on top of me. So don't even deny it. And why would I stop you? Am I nuts?" His blue eyes were all too satisfied for my taste.

"Shut up. Don't start Colin." I playfully kicked him and he caught my foot in his hands.

"Don't start what?" He leaned his body over mine, his mouth inches from mine. His fists pressed into the couch cushions on both sides of me. "This?" He leaned in but just as I leaned in to meet him, he laughed.

"You tease." I shoved him but he just fell on top of me. "Haha." I couldn't stop myself from laughing a little at him and he joined in, our laugher echoing throughout the house. He didn't make an attempt to get off of me and I tried to push him off of me but he was too heavy. "Get off." I tried once more but he leaned up on one elbow and leaned over me. I looked into his eyes and they were very mischievous. He brushed my hair out of my face and leaned down and kissed me on my cheek.

"I know. But you know that dress was a teaser too." His hands grazed my side and I giggled. "Wait a second? You're not denying it?"

"Nope." I laughed once more and stuck my tongue out at him.

"Payback." His fingers found my side once more and his hands traveled along my sides, tickling me. I immediately burst out into laughter and began to thrash my body from underneath him but he didn't stop himself.

"Stop… please…" But his fingers continued to play games along my skin. My laughing didn't let up at all. He continued all the while laughing at me.

Looking at him now, making me laugh at his lighthearted jokes only brings back that day for me. It was getting later and the café was the last place I wanted to be at the moment. I thought of that couch, the couch where it almost happened. That first day, the first time we ever talked, we kissed, we admitted our love for each other, yes it was that day that I can look back at now and know why I stand where I am. I stand by his side. And who knows where this new path will take us? Sure we will work together but so do Ginny and Josh, and it worked out with them.

He is so busy people watching that he doesn't even see me staring at him. But I find myself doing this more often each day, watching him watch things. He sees things so differently than I do or ever could do. He never ceases to fascinate me. And when I'm without him all I find myself doing is thinking about when I get to see him again. I know what you're thinking, oh boy does she have it hard, of course I do. But that doesn't matter. All that matters is who I've fallen for.

"What are you looking at?" He finally turns to me and watches me with quizzical eyes.

"Everything." And I just smile, lightly, and rest my head on my shoulder. I still don't dare pull my eyes from his and when they smile back into mine, I know why that day was the most important day in my life. Heck, every day since I've spent with him have been my best days. All my best days involve him somehow.

"Stop, you'll make me blush." But that doesn't stop him from grabbing my hand and kissing the top of it. "How about we go home now?"

"Home." That word, that morning when it became ours and not just mine. That night with Ginny and that surprised morning. It was when Ginny knew that things were serious and nothing and no warnings could she give me- would make me change my mind.

"Yeah. Sound good to you? I'll cook at home, I don't feel like leaving the house again tonight." He doesn't wait for me to answer before he drops my hand and tosses our trash. "Ready?"

His hand is out for me to hold and I never not smile at how perfectly mine fits in his. I let him take me home, our home. And I can't stop myself from smiling. His head lightly bumps into mine and I bump back. Sorry if this wasn't steamy enough for you but that's not all we are about. We are a couple and there are more intense moments in the beginning, I'll get there. Just be patient. I just love the smaller moments more, okay maybe not more, but just as much, maybe. ;) When he holds my hand, quietly leads me away, or even just watches me, those moments I treasure just as much. He knows me better than I know myself and he can always tell me what I'm thinking without me having to say a word. Somehow, he just knows what to say, I don't have to force him to listen, he loves to do so.

I don't mean to brag about how good our relationship is, especially if any of you who are reading this are single, don't worry, you'll get there too. Remember I was single before I met Colin, you never know your Colin could be right in front of you. I'm derailing from the main reason I am writing this. I just want to document our love story. And as I'm writing this, I keep flashing back to the small moments that make the bigger ones that much better.

After we got home, I fell asleep on him while watching the history channel. He was watching some pirate special and he was all too warm to not snuggle into. He was perfectly happy letting me cuddle up to him and sprawling my body across his and being completely unconscious. That's how I know where this is all headed to. But I can't get ahead of myself. I'll be back to tell you all more. Hopefully you are loving mine and Colin's story so far. By the way, being snuggled up close to him, he smells like Old Spice and cinnamon, always. And it's very intoxicating and I fight myself numerous times to just hold him and smell him. Haha. So as I dream of my fairytale…


	5. Chapter 5

Part 5

I can't believe I'm stuck with another actor, trying to see if we have chemistry. I know I don't. He is so stuck up and thinks he is all that and I am more than happy to let him know that, that isn't the case. But I keep my lips shut, I will leave all that to Eddie and Adam. They can bring the bad news and they can tell that I am not feeling it at all, with one flick of my eyes, they stop the reading.

"Ok, great. We will let you know once we review all the others. Thanks for your time." Adam and Eddie smile and he is soon ushered out. They turn to me and laugh. "Sorry about that. He seemed so perfect when he was by himself. I don't know what happened."

"I can tell you, he doesn't want to share the spotlight and that's not what Hook is about. Hook wants more than anything to be with me and good luck finding that." I smile and cross my legs. They give me their eye rolls and I drop my leg, my heel clicking against the floor. "What was that for?"

"Jen, the problem isn't finding guys who want to be with you, the problem is that you…" His words stop and I immediately get tense. Run Jen, Run is all I hear. "You don't have chemistry with just anyone. But we are getting very close to our cut off date. You have to try a little harder to see past them and try to see what he could bring to Hook."

I don't want to sit here anymore and hear about what I should be doing, forgetting about everything and only thinking about Hook? I can't do that, I have to have some chemistry otherwise the banter between the characters won't be as full hearted. But do they listen to what I say? No. I keep getting attacked like it's all my fault. See past them, try harder? What do they mean by that? I am trying, I am pushing myself to new limits, both professionally and personally but they don't know that. Have chemistry? Colin. I keep my mouth shut, I am in no position to go on the defense, that's probably not even what they meant. Calm down Jen, calm down.

"OK. I'll try." I force a smile and they know it's all for show but sometimes I have to do what needs to be done to move on. "Bring in the next guy."

When he steps in, I get all flustered. I don't even know what to do. I blush immediately and Adam and Eddie smile. His name is Tyler. And he is gorgeous, almost too gorgeous. He is chiseled perfection and his smile beams from ear to ear. I can have chemistry with him, for sure. He smiles and leans his hand out to Adam and Eddie then turns to me, his smile fades and then he shakes his head.

"Hello Jennifer. My name is Tyler. It's nice to meet you." I stand up and he hugs me, tightly. His hands slips down my back and I pull away quickly.

"Nice to meet you too." I bite my tongue. I have a weird feeling about him. But he is so charming that I know Eddie and Adam want me to make it work out. So I sit down opposite of him and we begin to read. He is weirdly pronouncing things and I'm trying my best to not react so weirdly but it's take everything out of me.

"Aye love." I can feel him staring at me and I just focus more on the papers in my hand. "Love." His British accent is somewhat clouding my judgment and all but that doesn't stop me from getting tense. This isn't how it should feel. Why can't I just get over the fact that none of them are Colin? I need to get over it. But all I can think about is tomorrow morning, him moving in and all.

"Jen? How do you feel about that?" Adam's voice makes me finally look up from my script.

"About what?" I look to Tyler and his smile makes me smile in return but my stomach turns.

"About letting Hook kiss you right away? Does that sound alright to you?" I know they are testing me, I get it. Tyler licks his lips and right there, right there I see past his perfect, accented, carved statue façade he puts out. He is a creep, straight down to it.

"Emma wouldn't allow that. She is too scared by her feelings for him to risk anything. She can't put her heart on a platter for him." I look back at Tyler and his face falls. "Sorry but you are not Hook. You don't understand him at all." I get up hand my script over to Eddie and lean into Adam's ear, "I have to get a drink. I'll be back but no, not him." I can hear him sigh as he shakes his head to Eddie.

I find Ginny in her trailer, practicing for her next scene. "Hey Jen, so how did the reading go? Any hopefuls?" I sigh and fall down on her couch. "That great huh? Don't worry you'll find someone." She pats my knee and gets up and heads to her fridge.

"You got something strong chilling in there?" I run my hands over my face and rub my eyes. "I don't know how much more I can take of this. For you it was so easy." I pout and she just laughs.

"Please, sure I was charmed by him and all but, that's what it was. Then after we met outside of work, things changed, I knew then and there that he'd be my prince. And no drinking until tonight." She sits down next to me and hands me a water bottle.

"Thanks. And I can't stop myself from comparing them all to Colin, how do I stop that?"

"That's all you Jen. You want your Hook? Go out there and find them."

I wake up to him fast asleep, history channel still on. I flip the TV off and head to the kitchen. Sure he promised to make dinner and all but he looked so sleepy and happy that I just couldn't wake up. He lightly tosses on the couch and I fight my giggle in my throat. I open my fridge and see ground chicken sitting there. Tacos, that sounds good.

As I fry the chicken, I think back to that day when Ginny told me to find my Hook, sure he is only a fictional character( I say this against the wishes of fangirls everywhere) and all but Emma found her Hook, I found my "Hook" in the man who plays him, Colin. I don't know why I felt so defeated that day, especially because from then on only my life could be getting better. That next morning, he would be moving in and we would start charging forward with our lives.

I think back to that sleepover, the night Ginny knew I was completely gone, head over heels, fallen so madly in love, with a man I had only met that day. But I just knew. She told me I'd know when I had found my Hook and looking at Colin or even thinking about him, I knew she was right. I knew, I just knew when I crashed into him that my life would never be the same. It wasn't a thought, I didn't debate it or toss it around my head. I just felt it, like it was the most natural thing in the world. It made sense. It was a like a song you had never heard before, but somehow you knew what the next lyrics would be. He was my song. And I would love to spend the rest of my life being beautifully unfinished with him.

He tosses once more but this time, he awakens. He smiles as he turns to me and it's soft and silent but screams words of love and admiration. I only know this because his look mirrors my own. I feel like the only thing in the entire world when he looks at me. Nothing, nobody else matters. Just me. It's corny and sweet and something to aspire to and I never thought I'd feel that. Feel so strongly for someone that you hate to go back and think of the memories where they weren't there. But think of how they could have been there, through it all, so woven into your life that nothing could tear them away from you. It all fits so perfectly. All your broken pieces, that feeling of being a little lost, of not being completely yourself, they come into your life and take a big eraser and erase all the fractured pieces, they mend them. They bring you home. They make you happy and proud to be unapologetically yourself. They are that star that shines so brightly, that star you won't ever miss, they guide you always home. He is that for me and I knew it the minute I saw him. They tease and say that love at first sight doesn't exist but that isn't entirely true. I met Colin, saw him, saw his storm beneath his eyes and I fell right there, while swimming among the rocky waves of his eyes. I sunk beneath the water after answering his siren call and my life has never been better. And I'm not trying to say that a man can save you, that a man completes you, no, I'm saying thee ONE, the ONE guy who you are meant to spend the rest of your life with, they can do that. And once you feel that, nothing is better than that. I can't even describe it or put it into words, I've tried but no words can do it justice. It's all in a feeling.

Love is like the wind, you cannot see it, but you can feel it.

Ginny arrives within an hour. I was so happy to only have to read with four other guys today. They were actually not all that bad. We have more readings to do Monday. Adam and Eddie want to go over the footage and watch our responses and see our body chemistry if there is any. I can think only of one guy they brought to me, his name was Steven. Actually wasn't that bad for me, he was cute but in an understated way and reading with him was easy and light. I know Adam and Eddie caught onto me. They for sure will have him come back for round two. The other guys not so much. It is a grueling process to limit them all to see which man is best for the job.

"Jen?" The door opens and I almost forgot that I had given her a key.

"In here." I lay in front of my fireplace, against the stones, feeling both cool and warm.

"What are you doing?" She drops her bag and plops down next to me. Her hands are warm as she rubs over my shoulder. "There isn't even a fire going. You crazy lady."

"I met with some more guys and I see potential finally. And I stopped comparing them to Colin incase you were wondering." I close my eyes and sigh. When she shoves me I laugh.

"I just want what's best for you and all. Colin is a great guy just don't shoot without bullets." I look at her and she is busy smiling.

"How long have you been sitting on that?" She laughs. I sit up and cross my legs.

"All day." She lightly laughs and I playfully shove her. "When are you seeing Mr. Fantastic again?" She heads to my kitchen and begins to fix drinks.

"Tomorrow morning." I yell. I smile to myself and run my hands over my bare arms. I feel goose bumps and I blush.

"I bet you're wearing a dopey lovesick grin doing on your face. Am I right?" She says it so sarcastically that I run right up to her and kiss her cheek. "What was that for?"

"For being my best friend. And for sticking by my side through everything. And for not completely going "Mom mode" on me over Colin. And for spending the night." I hop on top of my kitchen counter next to her and sit and watch her blend strawberry daiquiris.

"You don't have to thank me but you do have to spill everything. Drink up sister." She hands me a glass and _clinks_ with me.

"OK. Here is to Colin." I bat my eyes and sigh.

"Fine to Colin."

That was the first of many late night discussions of him. And all of them ended up with the same conclusion, I think I finally found my Hook.


	6. Chapter 6

Part 6

It was the next morning, someone was knocking at my door, I mumbled in my sleep then kicked Ginny.

"Ouch." She reached out and shoved me. "You get it." I mumbled some more and turned back onto my side. She shoved me again. "This is your house, it's obviously for you."

I snapped up at that, I knew exactly who it was, it was Colin. I sat upright in bed, wiped my eyes and kicked back the covers. "Don't get that, give me a minute. I need to fix my hair." I flew out of bed and ran straight into my bathroom. I quickly began to brush my hair and looked at myself in the mirror. My tank top was loose and all too revealing for seeing him for the second time. "Crap." My shorts were too short and I knew I needed to change. I brushed my teeth and sighed. I opened my bathroom door and stepped back into my bedroom, "Ginny, you think…" But Ginny wasn't there. "Shit."

The minute I stepped into the bathroom, Ginny grabbed my robe and headed downstairs. She was actually very surprised when she opened the door. "Oh Colin." She wrapped her robe tighter around her. "Wasn't expecting you, Jen is upstairs." Then she noticed his luggage. "What's going on here?" She crossed her arms in front of her chest and blocked the entrance.

I bolted down the stairs, Ava on my heels, she was lightly barking but when she saw Colin, she relaxed at his feet. "Colin, Ginny." I didn't know what else to say other than to state the obvious. I then remembered my clothing, better yet lack of clothing. I crossed my arms in front of my chest and began to blush. I caught amusing looks from Colin and a disapproving look from Ginny. I was caught in a rough spot. I turned to Colin, it'd be easier with him. "Second room on your right." I pushed Gin aside and let him in. As he headed up the stairs, I watched him go.

"Jen, want to explain. Last night we were talking about maybe going on another date with him and now you are letting him move in? Even Josh and I aren't there yet. What is going on with you? I think you are moving too fast." I shut the door and she followed me as I headed to the kitchen.

"Listen Gin, I totally love what you are doing for me. But I know what I am doing. He needed a place to stay, you and I both know what it's like to live out of a hotel, it blows, and this made sense. It's like he is renting. I just happen to love him. And I will be dating him, just I need to do this for him. Please don't think I'm crazy." I grabbed my iced coffee out of the fridge and poured three mugs. "Here. Talk to me instead of lecturing me." She took the coffee and smiled.

"Ok. I understand where you are coming from, but have either of you talked about how long this is going to last? Or maybe what the next plan is? I just, I get it, Jen, I do get it. I know how you feel about him, you made that clear last night but right now, I just need you to think like someone who isn't in love. The Jen before yesterday happened." She leaned against the counter and I shoved my coffee away.

"I don't want to go back to that Jen, I like the Jen I am when I'm with him. I love him and I get it. No we haven't talked about the future because no one, not even you knows what is going to happen. It's unseen and unheard of. If I'm thinking about the woman who isn't in love with him, yes him living under the same roof is terrifying but also thrilling. So Gin, please just be my friend on this." I grabbed my coffee and took a sip.

"Ok, you're right. It's just Josh won't even talk to me about moving in and I'm so ready for that. What do I say? Wait, what did you say?" I smile, she can do this sometimes, projects her feelings on me.

"Tell him the truth, and when I did, this happened." And just as I said that, Colin walked up behind me and wrapped his arms around me. My waist tingled underneath his touch and I easily leaned back into him.

"What happened?" He kissed the top of my head and you would never think we had just met the other day.

"Nothing." I turn around and smile up at him, he wraps his arms around my back and leans in but only kisses my forehead. "So, I have coffee ready." I reach around and hand him his mug. He lets me go but still rests his left hand on the small of my back.

He tastes it then makes a disgusted face. He sets the mug down and completely steps away from me. "You let it get cold?" He shakes his head and grabs another mug and begins to make a fresh pot, of hot coffee.

"It's iced coffee, my favorite besides chai tea. You don't like it?" I stifle back a laugh as he leans against my kitchen counter, his loose t-shirt exposing every inch of him that lies underneath that thin fabric. I blush but look away. I notice that I'm still barely wearing anything. I cover myself the best I can.

"No I don't care for it. And what are you doing? Are you cold?" He rubs his chin and I watch his stubble move around along his chin. And I'm suddenly very distracted by every little tiny thing that I notice about him. The way how he tends to lean a little to the left and how his fingers are constantly moving or doing something. "Hello? Are you with me?"

"Jenny?" Ginny's voice snaps me away from Colin. "Are you okay?" She steps closer to me and feels my head. "No fever. What is going on?" I just shake my head.

"I'm all good. I'm going to go change." The minute they think I'm out of ear shot, I hear them talk about me.

"She is so into you that you better not break her heart or you will have a swarm of people coming after you. Got it?" Ginny is so demanding and caring that I can't help but smile at how much she loves me. I almost continue to walk on but then Colin speaks.

"I would never and could never imagine hurting her. This may surprise you and all but I'd do anything and everything for her. She means the world to me, I know it sounds foolish and all because we have only met yesterday but for me that isn't the case. I feel like I've known her forever and Ginnifer, I love her with every fiber in my being. So no, I won't hurt her, I want her forever. And if that is too hard to believe for you, I'll spend the rest of my life proving that to both you and Jen. I don't want to ever imagine a part of my life that she isn't a part of. Okay?" He finishes and I have fresh tears in my eyes.

"Ok. And you're lucky because that woman means the world to me. She is like my sister and I've known her forever. And I just know that she gets burned a lot because she is so trusting and I'm a great judge of character. I believe you Colin. I do. And I'll back off now and let you two be. But you can't blame me for being protective and all." Ginny steps away and grabs a hot cup of coffee.

"I don't blame you and it makes sense and I'm glad she has you in her life because I've never seen a stronger friendship than between you and Jen."

After all that, that I spied on, I finally head upstairs. I'm not sure what to say to either of them after hearing that but I have to act as if I hadn't heard any of it. That's easier said than done for me honestly. I take a quick look over my clothing and sigh. Ava pads up next to me and before Colin, she was the only resident. I scoop her up in my arms and kiss her fuzzy little head. She was my everything and only thing before Colin. I snuggle her close and inhale her lavender scent.

"Hey girl, how do you like Colin living with us?" She gets really excited and leaps out of my arms. "I'll take that as a yes." She heads across the hall and I know Colin must be in his room because she heads straight to him. "Fine be that way." I turn back around and slide my tank top off. I grab a bra from my drawer and toss it onto my bed. I flip through my blouses and nothing seems good enough.

Colin stands aside and watches my bare back as I toss aside my tank top. A big part of him, wants to enter and see what else there is to me but he is too much of a gentleman. So he shuts his door while he falls back onto his bed. He knows that this is just the start of something even better than he could ever imagine. He is so in love with me that every part of him loses a little bit of himself to me. If that makes sense. It's like he gives pieces of himself to me and he wouldn't stop giving those pieces away, even if there was nothing left.

I finally decide on my favorite green jumper thing. It has t-shirt sleeves but it's all connected. Instead of pants though, it has shorts. I hope you know what I'm talking about. It's so cute that you would love it. But it brings out the green in my eyes perfectly. I leave down my hair and toss aside my pajamas. I quickly make my bed and I fight the urge to jump on it. You know when a bed looks too good that you sometimes want to mess it up? I smile as I make my way across the hall, to Colin's room, his door is shut and I bite my lip.

"Colin?" I lightly knock and within seconds, he opens. And when he sees me, he immediately breaks out into a happy grin. "What do you want to do today?" With one question, who knew I'd learn so much about him and who I was with him. And what it meant to be fully and truly and utterly in love.

He is still smiling at me, while I continue to cook the meat. "Are you going to do something with those eyes you are making at me or what?" I turn away from him completely and dig around in my cabinets. It takes no longer than a minute for me to feel his arms around me. I ease back into him the same way I always do, the same way I did that morning he moved in. I smile to myself, remembering what that day was all about. It was so full of adventure and love that I wish I could relive it all over again. And I guess by telling you all, I get to, so thanks.

"What I want to do is best served in the bedroom." His voice is raspy as he whispers in my ear and I instantly break out into a feverish heat and smile to myself. I want him so badly that to hold back is a struggle. His hands wander over my shirt and I have to step back into him completely. My hands wrap around his neck and he picks me up. My legs wrap around his waist and he sits me on top of the kitchen counter. I keep my legs wrapped around him while his mouth fights for mine. I melt into him, my lips finding their home. His tongue slips through and I moan. His hands refuse to fight with my shirt any longer. He quickly slides me out of it, tossing it to the floor. I fight with his shirt collar and we both quickly fight to unbutton it.

"You and your button downs are killing me." My fingers blindly move around him and before I know it, I'm touching his bare chest. He has a clump of hair right there under my warm fingertips. I lightly tug on it and he falls even more into me. He finds my lips once more, lightly biting and tugging on my lower lip. My hands let go of his chest hair and run traces along his skin. His hands wander across my back, pressing into my warm and bare flesh. I am squeezing his body to mine with my legs and he just keeps pressing into me, making me fight to keep the rest of my clothes on.

"Stop teasing me." His words are a whisper on my lips and his breath smells of cinnamon and he is right there for my taking. I nod back to him and I know now that I'm so beyond turning back but a part of me doesn't even care. I want this right now, so badly. It's not like our first time, when I was so nervous and yet calmer than I've ever been. You'll get there, just wait.

"Take me now." He doesn't wait but scoops me up into his arms, flicks off the burner as he carries me upstairs and into my bedroom. He tosses me back onto my bed and works at removing my jeans. I smile up at him and his jeans are tossed aside as well. He falls on top of me and I lightly giggle as his stubble tickles my bare stomach. His mouth marks a trail of kisses all the way back up to my lips. And once they are back in my possession, I clutch him as tight as I can to myself, and his fingers weave their way through my hair. He picks me up and slides us further up into my bed. I smile and continue to live on his lips while his hands wander over me. His body is warm against mine and I can't fight that feeling any longer. I let him become one with me.

"So much Jen. I have a lot that I want to do with you." His charming grin and raised brows make me blush. I smile and nod. "Are you ready for an adventure?" He grabs my hand and I smile at him, even wider.

"With you, I'm up for anything." He smiles back at me, spins me around real quickly then plants a kiss on me. His lips are sweet on mine and the minute we kiss, I fall into him. He makes me see fireworks and with every touch, I'm only more thirsty for him.

"Good and by the way you look beautiful." He lets me go and grabs the shirt from his bed. He removes his t-shirt and his bare chest is right there in front of me. I try to memorize every inch but also to not stare. But I can't tear my eyes away. He slides a button down jean shirt on and his bare arms bulge as he buttons them. "And you can stop drooling over me now."

I get pulled back and know that my face couldn't possibly be any redder. I playfully shove him but he catches my wrist. "And I wasn't drooling over you."

"You sure? Because I'd understand, every time I am with you, I catch my breath." He pulls me in his arms and just holds me. He can't see my smile, and the way he makes me feel. But I just hold him tighter and vow to spend every day trying to show him.


	7. Chapter 7

Part 7

I wake up with the moon still out and I look to my left at my bedside clock and the horrible numbers of 3: 21 stare back at me. I'm awake and it's still the middle of the night, nothing new. But usually when I'm with Colin, I sleep like a baby. That is if I plan on sleeping. I turn to see if he is still sound asleep and all but he isn't there. The bed feels cold from where he should be. I sigh and fall back into the bed. I try to ignore the fact that he didn't stay but it gnaws at me. Before I know it it's 4:10 and I still can't let it go. I toss back the covers and grab his shirt from the end of my bed. Buttoning it as I head down the stairs, I almost trip over Ava who has decided to walk in-between my feet. I don't see any lights on or anything. So I finally flip on the hallway light. No noise, my house was silent.

"Colin? You there?" I keep padding my feet along the bare floor and I am the only noise in the entire house. I feel let down and don't know what happened. He would at least leave me a note. I run to the kitchen, turn on the lights and find a small note right by my tea kettle.

Jen,

Had to leave but don't worry, I'll be back before you wake. Just don't worry ok. I know you, I love you.

Colin

Don't worry, is he serious? Of course I'm going to worry about him. And be back before I wake? Yeah nope. I sigh and toss aside the note and I feel let down. I don't know why he had to leave, especially in the middle of the night. Now most women would jump to an affair but there is no way he is cheating on me, he's never without me. I can still feel Ava at my feet and I smile.

"Still have you baby." I pick her up, grab a bottle of water and carry her to the living room. The couch looks empty and you can still see the impression he had made on it, last night. I sink down into the soft cushions and flip the TV on. HGTV comes on and it's an old rerun of my favorite, "Holmes on Homes". "Just you and me girl." But I sound deflated, normally this would just be like an everyday thing but since Colin came into my life, I'm not happy with it just being Ava and I. I need him, more than I let on. My life isn't the same without him and I don't want to go back to a time without him. I know what you are thinking.

That's just because you are dating someone, and I'm just being dramatic but that's not the case. I know what my life is now with him, know how I feel, know who I am with him, and I don't want to lose any of that. I need him in my life because I can't imagine a day without him. He is too important and too much of a presence in my life that life wouldn't be the same and I don't want to think like that. I shake my head and watch him begin to tear a wall apart, surely someone did a poor job on this house.

Ava dozes off in my lap and I just continue to lightly rub her fur. It's quiet, even with the TV on and machines going, it still is too quiet for me. I gently set Ava aside and head to my record player. I grab my crate and set it in front of me on the floor. I flip through them all and decide on two. Lana Del Rey's "Born To Die" and Creedence Clearwater Revival's "Greatest Hits". I pick the latter and soon my favorite song is playing, of theirs I should say.

"And I wanna know have you ever seen the rain, I wanna know have you ever seen the rain, coming down on a sunny day." I am swaying with the music and Ava's little head picks up from the couch. And I can't help but smile and giggle and blush from this song. To that day with our adventures. That time he sang this to me while we swayed getting soaking wet. The time when he whispered what I did for him. And this song takes me right back to that moment and I don't feel so alone anymore. I feel his arms around me and I smell his Old Spice and I hear his breathing, can feel his heartbeat through his shirt. I can taste the rain and I can feel my clothes sticking to me.

And if you knew me I hate being cold and wet at the same time, most of all but for some reason, in his arms that day, I didn't care at all. I let him hold me, let the rain wash me away, let that moment take over. And his arms held me so tightly to him, I fought the urge to kiss him. I just wanted him like I've never wanted anything before. But I also refused to ruin any little moment with him by not being able to control myself. He was singing to me, his angelic and raspy voice drawing me closer and making me want him even more.

"Head out for a date?" He grabs my hand and we walk down the stairs together, his hand in mine. It's so solid and so safe that I don't fear anything new. Sometimes I get nervous to try new things, like anyone really, but with his hand in mine and his eyes on me, I'm not nervous at all. He makes me feel free to be myself and free to live without worry. His smile draws me closer to him, the minute we are in the foyer. I flirtatiously giggle and his nose bumps mine and I don't kiss him when he leans in. "Don't tease me." He leans in again but I pull my lips away from him. "You're just reeling me in aren't you?"

Ginny pads into the hallway, coffee in hand and my robe still on her. Ava follows behind her and I quickly pull away from him. My hand feels empty and I think I catch a grimace on his face, just a flash and then it's gone.

"Hey, what are you two up to?" She blows on her coffee before she takes a sip and I just smile at her.

"A walk, a day out you could say." I lift myself up on my toes and then back down. She smiles at me, and says you go girl with her eyes. I can read her. "Thanks", I mouth.

"It's my treat. Given I don't know where anything is here and all, I'm going to lead us on an adventure. Or at least I'll try." He laughs nervously and I saddle right back up to his side.

"Well after my coffee, I'm out of here, Ava can come home with me and I'll bring her back tomorrow morning? On set?" She nods and smiles above her coffee mug. So much for me taking things slow.

"Ok, only if you want to." I wink at her and I have a feeling Colin knows all, he is no idiot after all.

"Okay, you two have fun." She waves to us both then shoos us both out our own front door. Then she sees my little shoulder bag and tosses it to me. "You'll need this. Phone is already in it for you. Love you, bye." And then the door is in our faces.

"She really thinks you need to get out." He laughs and it only takes us four steps before he brings up the cold shoulder treatment I gave him earlier. "What was that for? Earlier I mean, dropping my hand and pulling away from me. Like you were a teenager in trouble." He stops in front of the passenger side door of his car and I bite my lip and look down. "Look, I need you to be honest…"

"She thinks I'm insane and I'm moving too fast with you, having you move in and all. She loves me but thinks I'm too crazy for already being in love with you. And she is my best friend and all but she just worries and I didn't want to start another conversation and all about us going too fast." It all came out in a rush and quick word vomit and instead of him getting all frustrated with the fact that I was hiding my affection, he pulls me by my hands, closer to him.

"Jen, I'm fine with that and all, avoiding confrontation. I try to as well but don't hide me. Ok?" He pulls me into his arms and I wrap myself around his neck and I lean into his shoulder. "Now that we are all good. Want to go somewhere fun?"

"Do you even know where you want to go? You hardly know where anything is." I weave my fingers through his and press into his palms.

"I think I can find my way." He smiles then opens my door and lets me get in. He is such a gentleman and so charming that I find myself in awe of him, so many times and in so many ways that part of me feels like he is all just a dream that I refuse to wake up from.

It doesn't take long for him to get lost. And I should know where he had lead us being for the fact that I've lived here for almost two years but when you're in a car with Colin, the last thing you are thinking about it where he's driving. We sang along to the radio, talked about our families and I found myself watching him, staring really. I couldn't help myself. The way the corners of his mouth twitch up now and then and how his lip quivers ever so slightly when he's really nervous or excited to talk about something. How he fights to not talk with his hands and how his eyes every once and a while find their way to me.

"I should pull over, ha! There's a convenience store right there. Come on." He pulls along the curb but I don't follow him out of the car. "What's wrong?" His head pops back in the door and I try my hardest not to laugh at him.

"I'm hungry." I try to give him my cutest little pout I can manage and all but I know he isn't buying it. "At least get me a donut." I get out of the car and I follow him quickly in. "I'll grab food, while you figure out where the hell you took us."

"Deal." He kisses the top of my head and I run right to the donuts while he finds out where we are. The minute I'm out of ear shot, I breathe. I don't know why I'm so tense about today. I mean technically, this is our first date, I just think it should be perfect. But can something ever be truly perfect?

And looking back at it now, all that worrying was for absolutely nothing. And wondering if things could be absolutely perfect? It was, for me anyway. So we didn't go to a fancy sit down restaurant, or went to see a movie at all. We had convenience store hot dogs, a bottle of water and donuts. We didn't head back into the car at all, instead we kept walking to a park that Colin had found out about. It was quiet, cloudy, and lightly breezy. That day, and his words, our playfulness, and that dance, it is all a close memory, just a thought away.

"Five star dining, only the best for my love." He laughed as he took a huge bite out of his hot dog.

"I don't have to be all lady like and proper do I?" He shook his head and I beamed, "good." I dug into my hot dog, swallowing half of it in one bite.

"Glad I said no, I had no idea all that monster was inside you." He lightly laughs then polishes of his hot dog. "You have ketchup all over your nose." He grabs a napkin and proceeds to wipe my face as if I am a little child.

"Thank you, my prince." I grab a donut and shove it in his face. "Let me help you with all that glaze on your face." I laugh and can't help but eat the donut afterwards.

"Did you really do what I think you just did?" He grabs the remainder of my hot dog and attempts to shove it in my face.

"Don't even try." I get up and hop away from him as he proceeds to chase me with the remainder of my hot dog. "Colin, don't." I jump on the stone wall behind the bench, and it isn't tall, just a little wall built for the enclosure of the trees. The kind you'd see in a fancy park.

"Jen, come here, I have something for you." He attempts to jump up after me but the minute he does, the hot dog slips out of the bun.

I immediately burst into laughter. "Haha. Epic fail." I laugh even at his puppy dog face. "Here." I hand him the last donut and offer it to him as a peace offering.

"No, you have it." He hands it back to me and I don't fight it. "Can I say something?"

"Sure." I say all muffled for the fact that I have a whole donut in my mouth.

"I love you." He smiles then takes my hand and we walk around the little wall together.

After I finish swallowing, I stop, turn around and rest my hand on his chin. "I love you too." I quickly kiss him, my other arm instinctively wrapping itself around his neck. He leans into my lips and his arms slip around me, pulling me up and into him. His hands are warm on my back and I push myself into him even more.

"I don't care about rushing, Colin, I am in love with you." I pull away, just a little, so the words can dance along his lips. I lean in but he pulls back, my eyes find his and he has tears in them. "What did I do? Did I step on you?" I pull ever so slightly away from him and look down at my feet.

"No, not at all." He lightly laughs then rubs his chin. "It's just that you've saved me. I never thought that true love could ever exist. I mean fairytales, are just that, tales. It all makes sense. I understand now why everyone wants it, why everyone wants to define it, why it makes you feel whole again. Love, it's a real thing, concept and all. I never thought that what my parents have with each other could ever be created again, and then I saw you. I know why people say love at first sight. I gave up all hope Jen, until you stumbled or ran into my life." He allows a light chuckle then regains all seriousness. "I don't want to lose this, I now know why people want it so bad, it's the closest thing we have to magic. You saved me, you gave me magic. And I love you Jen. I will spend the rest of my days proving that to you." He hesitates moving in and I refuse to hold back my need for him.

"I'm afraid that this will all just go away. That I'll lose you. I need you too much to ever imagine another day of my life not being spent with you." I look down and I can feel his eyes on me. He lifts my chin and lightly kisses my lips. "I refuse to…" He shuts me up with another soft kiss, his lips only making my insides even more into a puddle. The skies crack and I sense rain. I should run but I stay. I should run away from my words, the feelings I should bury, right? No. I have to get my own happy endings out of life, right? So I don't run away. "I will never not need you in my life, you are my life."

"And you are mine." He wraps me in his arms again and I can't help the tears from slipping down my cheeks, leaving tracks of salt water, the only evidence of my overwhelming joy and love I have for him.

The first raindrop falls and wets my arm then not a split second later, it begins to pour. He laughs and pulls away from me, his arms trying to shield his eyes as he attempts to look at the storming sky.

"This doesn't look so good. Should we leave?"

"No." He looks back down at me surprised but then he raises his eyebrows. "I don't want to leave." I grab his hand back in mine and he pulls me right up to him, in one tugging motion.

"Then we shall dance." I rest my head on his shoulder as he sings to me, "And I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain, I wanna know have you ever seen the rain, coming down on a sunny day." His voice is a little raspy but smooth and crystal clear. His hand rests on the small of my back as he lightly sways me as the rain continues to fall down on us. I don't care about my clothes clinging to me or the fact that I'm cold and wet. It doesn't matter as his voice lulls me even more into the dream of him. "And I wanna know…" His mouth sings the song of the moment right into my ear and I close my eyes and let him take me away. Let him make me stay.

"Jen?" I hear a faint voice calling me and the lights go on. "Jen?" His voice is forcing its way into my sleep state.

"Hmmm." My word is muffled because I'm still lying on the floor, the record long time done playing. I force myself up on my elbows and realize that I'm literally only wearing his shirt, nothing underneath.

He turns off my record player and kneels in front of me. "Are you okay?" His hand rests on my bare knee and I instantly feel a crackling fire burning within me as his touch sets my skin on fire.

"No. You were gone and you tell me not to worry? Are you serious? Of course I'm going to worry. Why didn't you tell me where you were going at whatever time you left?" I am awake now and I begin to rub away the sleep clouding my eyes so I can see him better.

"Because a friend was in need and I promised, that I'd keep it between us. Please don't be mad, I know we promised no secrets, but this isn't my secret to tell." He fully sits down next to me, his arm wrapping itself around my waist, his hand playing with my knee.

"Fine. Just don't scare me like that." I inch closer and he knows to close the distance between us. "I can't help but be worried when you aren't with me." My little slips of vulnerability would be a turnoff for other men but not Colin, incase you haven't noticed, Colin isn't like any other men you might know.

"I worry for you too. I'm sorry. Come here." He pulls me into his lap and my head rests on his shoulder and his lips find my forehead. "I am here now. Can you tell me what you were doing asleep on the floor."

I pull my head from his shoulder and my groggy, yet awake, eyes find his. "I was listening to the first song you ever sang to me." I don't have to tell him, he smiles and begins to sing to me once more.

"And I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain coming down on a sunny day…" He kisses my lips, softly then smiles. He slides me off his lap and gets up. His hand is out to me and I smile back up at him. Once I'm safely back into his arms, his voice lulling me into a dream, I close my eyes and I can feel myself slipping away. He picks me up in his arms and carries me back to bed. He tucks me in and whispers "I love you", along my lips before kissing me back to sleep.

I muffle "love you" but I'm not sure I was even loud enough for him to hear me. He steps away, the shuffling on the floor lets me know his time won't be spent falling asleep with me. I don't remember much about the rest of the night, I drifted off into a happy and safe slumber. But that day, coming home after the dance in the rain, that I will always remember.


	8. Chapter 8

Part 8

We had to run into the house, we could barely see the steps in front of us. The sky was so dark and we were so soaked. The minute I got in, I tried the lights. The power was out. I slid my phone out of my purse, suddenly very glad that I bought the waterproof case. No signal. I set it down on the table by the door, slamming the door shut behind Colin. He is laughing and shaking out his hair. Water droplets make their way to my floor, adding to the already dripping puddle we've made. I turn to him, in the dark, him only mere inches away from me but for all I can see, he's miles.

"Jen?" His hands reach out to me and find their way around my waist. "It's probably best we get out of these wet clothes."

"Yeah." I gently remove his hands from my waist and take a look around. "I hate to tread water through the house." I begin to shiver and his warm hands light my skin the minute they rub up my arms.

"Okay. Then we will get undressed here." He lets go and begins to toss aside everything until he is only in his boxers. His eyes still burn through the darkness and are daring me to relax and forget about barriers. "Tell me you aren't nervous."

"I'm… not." I say my voice weak from being way too cold.

"Then come on already, you'll get sick." He reaches to unzip my jumper and I let him. I don't shoo away his fingers as they slowly climb their way down my dress, pulling on the zipper, the fabric opening and baring my flesh.

I gulp and let out a small breath. Once my jumper is fully unzipped, he slides it off my shoulders then helps me shimmy out of it. The heavy and damp fabric falls in a weight of water and fabric at my feet. I stand there, in nothing but my bra and underwear, still shivering. "I'm gonna take a hot bath." I leave the clothes there and nearly catapult myself up the stairs. Once I'm safely in my bedroom, I lean against the door. It doesn't take long for him to knock at my door.

"Jen? Open the door please?" I take a quick breath but don't make him wait. His eyes are searching mine and the intrusion is actually welcome. "Mind if I join you?" He is nervous asking, I can sense how his muscles are tense. This is my one chance to say I'm not ready, that I'm rushing everything, that we have all the time in the world. But even in the dark, I can see his deep ocean, blue, eyes calling me in, daring me to tempt the seas. I smile back at him, opening myself up. I open the door all the way.

Nothing is said as he heads into my bathroom, I'm quickly behind him, still shivering. I head over to the cabinet and pull out my biggest candle, the flames dancing along the mirror, basking the room in a golden glow. He turns the knobs on the tub, the curves in his back making me want him in me even more. To take that step, to not wait. I see a small scar at the end of his left shoulder blade and immediately trace the light, puckered flesh with my index finger. He doesn't tense, doesn't get nervous. Just laughs and spits out and explanation.

"Tree house injury. I fell and cut my shoulder going down. Needed twenty stitches. Healed up nicely." He continues to leave his back to me and it's almost as if he is unsure of where to go from this. He opened his mouth to get the ball rolling but the ball is in my court. I kiss his scar, then wrap my arms around him from behind and begin to kiss his shoulders.

He turns me around and soon, his hands are holding my face and tugging me in closer to him. His lips draw and tug on mine and demand more out of me than I've ever given away before. His mouth moves along with mine, dancing, making me take steps and turns I never knew I was capable of executing. His hands still hold my face firm and my hands fight with him to let me in. I slide my tongue in, needing to taste more of him. He doesn't stop, not reacting at all, just falling into it with me. He tastes of salt and cinnamon and I suckle on his lower lip. His hands fall from my cheeks and get lost in my wave of tangled wet hair.

I hear the water clicking along the bell that hangs from the spout and I pull away, quickly flipping the water off. I'm out of breath and flushed with color when I turn back to him. I'm half panting and half lifeless beats as if my oxygen was stolen with every touch of his skin and lips along mine. He just flashes his eyes, just a hint to see if I'm still up for where this water will lead us. He takes a step closer to me and grabs my face, gently, once more. With a quick kiss then he lets go. His hands rest along my bra straps. He is waiting for the go ahead, he's baiting me. It's all up to me, he says with his eyes. Those siren eyes. I nod and then it's a chain reaction.

His hands quickly and hungrily remove me from the confines of my bra. He tosses it aside and marvels at me. But not too long. His hands slowly slide me out of my panties, all the while never losing eye contact with me. He doesn't dare pull away from my eyes. I don't help him remove that last piece of clothing, he quickly lets it join my other damp delicates that rest to the side of the bathroom door. Standing there, face to face, bare flesh there and free, I don't do what my brain is screaming at me to do. I do what my heart is whispering to me, in-between beats. _Go to him._

And I do. I step into the warm bath water and turn around, my feet fully submerged. I reach out my hand to him and once it slides into mine, I feel safe again. I marvel at his chest, how sculpted it is, perfectly chiseled in a way that doesn't classify as a pretty boy. He slides down in front of me. My legs kick his and he breaks our too intense silence.

"Injure me in other ways love please." He grabs my legs and wrap them on either side of him. I realize that this is way more intimate than I expected it to be. He tugs on my legs until I'm perfectly resting in his lap. His mouth is fighting inches from mine and I want more than anything to lean into him, taste him once more. But that will surely lead to the one thing, that one thing, that will set me into a whole new chapter with him. "You're not there yet with me are you love?" His mouth pulls back and his sweet words dissipate between our distance.

"Not quite. I'm so sorry." I look down but with my arms wrapped around his neck, my breasts are being pushed into his chest.

"No worries. I'd wait forever for you." And there he is with those lips, those reliable lips, the same ones that make me dizzy and clearheaded at the same time. The same lips that make me have faith in my own happily ever after. Those lips that make me yearn and moan and long and hunger for him.

"Thank you." I slide myself away, the water leaving nothing to our imagination. He is watching me, drinking me all in. I fight to keep my eyes above the water. But he keeps baiting me, so I take a look. I try to hide the astonishment from my eyes. There he is, for me, all for me. I blush and I know he is smiling at me. "Stop."

"Stop what? Stop you from checking me out?" I blush even more when he lightly taps my legs with his feet. "Relax, I haven't been able to stop looking at you. And baby I'm amazed." He shakes his head, so proud of himself.

"Shut up." I scoot back up to him and open his legs, I turn around and slide my back up against his bare chest. He takes the washcloth with what little soap he allowed himself to use and began to lightly rub circles along my bare back. The soapy, warm, water is refreshing and relaxing and I've stopped shivering completely. He continues to wash me, sliding along my legs. Lifting my arms and tickling me. I continue to lean into him until he slides out from underneath me and lets me do the same. "I am sorry. It seems awfully foolish of me to hold back when there isn't anything from stopping me from bathing you."

He turns around and smiles at me, as he leans over me, his body being supported by his fists resting on either side of me. "But that's letting me in, letting me fill you in, connecting ourselves. Our flesh mingling in a messy and perfect way. Our bodies intertwining in a mess of heat and limbs. My breath hot on your skin, my mouth finding new places along your bare flesh. Your hands finding new places to rest along, me finding new places to take you. Causing you to experience a new kind of euphoria, your face so burnt with pleasure that you'll be begging me to stop. Wishing you never knew what it would be like. And all the while, stuck in a dream." His mouth is inches from mine and suddenly I don't know how to breathe again.

I gulp and I'm panting, my chest rising in and out of the water. He grabs the washcloth from my clenched up fist and tosses it on the side of the tub. He says nothing and neither do I. My body is shaking and aching for him. He knows exactly what he's done to me. His body slides out from the water, suddenly leaving the water very chilled. He leaves me there, only offering me a quick glance before he grabs a towel and loosely wraps it around his waist and looses himself in the darkness. The minute he leaves, I grab the water and splash it along my cheeks. No use, I know that a wildfire has spread itself across my skin, I pull the plug and let the water drain.

I step out, grab the candle and find my room empty. I grab my robe from my chair and the plush, soft, fabric warms me even more. I take my wet body and pad down the stairs, the candle the only source of light. I find him, resting on the couch. I lead the candle into the room, slowly placing it down on the coffee table. I stand in front of him, biting my lip.

"You are so beautiful Jen." He has his hands resting on his thighs and I suddenly know what I want more than anything. He sees me step closer and I tap his legs a little, enough to create a space for me to stand.

"I want to be everything for you. And I want everything with you. I need you Colin." I step even closer in-between his legs, his towel barely still wrapped around his waist.

His hands reach up to mine, my hands clutching the strings of my robe. "Wait. Jen, I'm not going anywhere, I can wait."

"But what if I can't." And with my eyes dancing along his in that single candle flame, I untie my robe, sending it crashing down at my feet. His hands intertwine with mine and I lean down onto him. My legs straddle his side and I untangle my hands and rest them along his face. His hands lose themselves within my tangled locks of golden hair. His mouth crashes into mine and it's all I've been waiting for, this moment, to be complete and whole within someone's open net. I fell and yet I've never felt safer than to crash land to where I am. He continues to kiss me, pushing into me, sending me to totter back, his arms catching me, holding me close to his chest.

He doesn't stop as he picks me up in his arms, my legs wrapped around his waist as he carries me upstairs. His lips only pull away just to smile at me. Then within a kiss, he whispers, "I love you."

I kiss him back, the words sliding into every inch of our embrace, "I love you." And he sends me crashing back into the bed, letting me guide our dance. I let him in and he proved actions speak louder than words. And he made me feel all kinds of stars that night. And I've never felt like I was ever living in a dream until that night. A dream that only his pull away from skin, could wake me. A spell of the deepest kind. A euphoria at its highest. A love bonded in flesh and bone.

I wake up with that memory still on my lips. I smile to myself as I smell breakfast. I look to my clock and happily see it's well after ten. And they say there is nothing like the first time but with Colin, he makes me feel the same way, every time. The same if not better than that one night. The night when I surrendered to my heart and his wills with me. And just at the thought of his skin pressed into mine, I break out into a feverish grin. I let my heart lead, and it drove me straight into him.


	9. Chapter 9

Part 9

The minute I am downstairs, I see Ava pacing back and forth in the hallway until she sees me and then she darts right up to me and paws at my legs. "Okay, gosh you are so spoiled." I pick her up and carry her with me into the kitchen, where I know Colin is waiting. I watch him pour pancake batter into the frying pan always so focused on the task at hand. I lean against the island in the middle of my kitchen, his back to me, so unaware of my presence. I just take these few seconds to stare at him. I look at the man who scares me to be unafraid everyday. I look at the keeper of my one and only fragile heart. To the one who is the person I want to share everything and anything with. The one who gets me in ways that others just can't or won't try to. The one who knows what I'm thinking or feeling just by looking at me. He is all these things and more. And I'm never not in awe of him or the way that he makes me feel.

"I know you are watching me again. Mind telling me why?" He finally flips the finished pancake onto a plate then slides it across to me and leans on the counter. His scruff is so desirable and I fight myself on reaching over and running my fingers over it. He smiles to me and then his eyes squint a little. "I'm watching you Jen."

"I was only staring because I'm amazed by you is all." I catch him raising his eyebrows and I quickly shovel pancakes into my mouth, without syrup I try not to make a face. He lightly laughs and I can't help it as I slowly swallow the very dry pancake.

"You asked for it. And by the way, I have to go to set for a costume fitting. All leather." He raises his eyebrows at me and grins, devilishly.

"Don't even start bedroom eyes at me." I reach across the counter for the syrup but his hands clasp mine and don't let me go just yet. "What?"

"You don't ever fully see the way you affect me, do you?" I say nothing, too silenced to speak. "I couldn't do anything without you. I fell for you without knowing so until I woke up the following morning not having you by my side, and it felt worse than death. So you say you're amazed by me? Honey, you don't know what that means until you can see and feel the way I do for you." He pulls me away from the counter, sets Ava down and pulls me into his arms. I easily wrap my arms around his neck and grab the nape of his neck, his bed hair sticking in odd ways between my fingers.

"You can't feel the way my heart beats for you? Honestly?" I don't speak more but let him hold me still. It's like I was about to disappear and he is afraid to let go. I don't know how to reassure him because I feel that way sometimes, okay most times because I can't stop myself from watching him. "Feel it."

"I do." His mouth finds my neck and the soft and gentle kiss he places there, in the crook does more for me than if he would have said I love you. He doesn't see the smile that spreads to my cheeks nor can he see my heart skip a beat whenever he is touching me. I snuggle further into him. "I won't let you go Jen, never."

"You're mine Colin. Ok?" I pull on him then force my lips on his, I fight the tears in my eyes, I can't help but be overcome with emotion whenever I'm with him. I can't really act this way when we are in public for fear of the paparazzi. We are pretty good at avoiding it but sometimes it gets to us. And it catches up to us and then we are the talk of the town, something both of us hate. So when we have these quiet moments, I take them for all that I can.

"You don't have to worry about that, I don't want to be anyone else's but yours." He smiles so widely and proudly at me that I'm not sure what to do with it other than smile back. "You're such a dork." He kisses my forehead than lets me go.

"Good and you're a nerd." I playfully shove him back then grab my plate of pancakes and head into the living room. He follows quickly behind me and Ava is already curled up in a ball on my chair so I sit with Colin on the couch. He lightly kicks my leg and I shove him back. "Stop you bully."

"You want a bully babe, I'll be one." He just smiles and takes the clicker before I can get it. He immediately puts on his sports and normally I don't mind. I watch my lifetime movies but the last thing I want to do before he has to rush into work and I'm left all alone is for us to spend that time together watching sports.

"Uh no." I just wait for him to change the program but our DVR is filled with games beyond games. "Can't we watch a movie?" I curl into him and know that I will win this.

"Uh no. I have to get these off the DVR so when you record your stuff there will be room. Like all these concert specials that you love so much." He slides the clicker as far away from me as possible.

"So you'd rather watch sports then spend time with me?" I don't even look at him, even when he turns the game on pause and turns to look at me. "Fine, have it that way."

"Come on now. Don't even mess with me, that's not funny." He tries to get me to look at him but I just continue to eat my pancakes and I still say nothing. "Jenny love, don't let this get to you. Fine, you can watch your movies." He hands me the clicker but I let it fall on my lap.

I get up with my plate, sending the clicker to the floor and I just walk past him with my plate as I head into the kitchen. I silently smile to myself as I hear him chasing after me.

"You know that's not what I meant by that. Come on, please." He sounds so sweet and a small part of me feels guilty but the other part fights to suppress the laughter. I am trying really hard to but when he steps in front of me, his sadness and guilt turns to anger. "Are you kidding me?! That's not even funny."

"I'm sorry but I made a plan and I was sticking to it." I can't hold back anymore and I burst into laughter. "Ok I'm so sorry, please don't be mad at me." I reach for him but he shakes me off. "Colin, come on."

"This isn't funny. I hate when you do that, I hate it when I fall for it." He shakes it off then smiles at me. "You're gonna be the death of me love."

I almost was. I almost lost everything I had fought for.

Her name was Kelly. And she was so sweet to me and I honestly took her under my wing and she knew that Colin was a friend but no one knew he was to be seen for the role of Captain Hook nor did they know him and I were a thing. He didn't even know that I was a part of the show, finding that out would come later. But she was so sweet and I would always go to her for last minute touch ups and I asked her to hangout and get drinks with me one night. Colin was off that night doing his thing and we stumbled into my house, wasted. We were laughing and giggling and acting all obnoxious. We made so much noise that night that we woke up Colin.

"What's going on?" He came down the stairs all exhausted and I wasn't sure of the time, that night is still fuzzy to me. This was one of those random nights that you'd rather wish to forget. He caught me before I fell down and he shook his head at us. "You two are gone." He had to support me because I kept falling over. Kelly was already laying in the foyer.

"I had some things, two drinks, things and I don't know. I'm a tired, sleep time now, I think. She drink and sleep why?" Yeah I didn't make sense.

"Shh.. You're ok now. Come on." He carried me up and laid me in my bed, not bothering to tuck me in. "I'll be right back." He carried Kelly to the couch, so he told me. And then came back up to me. "Do you want to get changed?" He leaned over me and rubbed my head.

I don't think I ever answered but just mumbled instead. He stayed by my side all night, helping me to the bathroom when I felt like I was going to throw up. Held my hair while I tossed away everything that I had in me.

We were bonded in that night. She fell for the gentleman in Colin. Who wouldn't? It got worse. She didn't let him go. But it all happened slowly. Little moments here and there. But after it all, it hit me like a brick, her final act, a knife in my heart. That was when she went after Colin. Yes we were established as best friends but come on, I told her that I had dibs. But she broke girl code and he nearly broke my heart. He hung out offset for me a lot. And she knew when I got off. I was headed to him, three blocks left of the lot and what I saw happening in his car, made me scream.

There she was, all over him, his lips on hers and my heart being shattered into a million pieces. When he finally pulled away, he looked right at me, horror and grief stricken in his face. I wanted nothing to do with either of them. (Now mind you, this was sometime after our first week, he was mine already.) I had to get away, the tears and the pain wouldn't stop. I couldn't breathe.

"JEN! JEN WAIT!" He caught up to me but by then, I thought I was going to pass out. "Wait!" He spun me around to look at him but I yanked my arm away from him.

"DON'T TOUCH ME! YOU… you, you. I don't want to ever see either of you again!" I pushed him away but he wasn't letting up.

"She kissed me, I pushed her off. I swear! My heart belongs with yours!" He had tears in his eyes, pain and guilt and grief masking his sweet and gentle face. I was too stubborn and hurt to believe him then.

"Shut up! I hate you!" I pushed him away and ran back on set. I begged to stay at Ginny's.

Josh had moved in only two days before and I was staying in her guest room when there was a knock on her front door. I knew who it was. Josh was best friends with him, he probably called him, himself. I didn't want to see him. At all! But before I could prepare myself, he was knocking at my door. I was cuddled up into one of her long nightgowns, the kind nuns would wear but it was so comfy. I was in a ball, fresh tears slowly and silently spilling down my cheeks. I didn't want him to see me at all.

"Love me tender, love me sweet, never let me go. You have made my life complete, and I love you so. Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled, for my darling, I love you, and I always will. Love me tender, love me long, take me to your heart, for it's there that I belong, and we'll never part." His soft angelic voice broke through the door and his fingers playing the guitar, the only way he knew how to strum and I couldn't help but want him to come in. He didn't wait for me to okay it, he pushed the door open and stepped in. He came up to my side of the bed and leaned on one knee and kept singing to me. "Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled, for my darling, I love you, and I always will. Love me tender, love me dear, tell me you are mine. I'll be yours through all the years, till the end of time." He kept singing to me and I couldn't cry anymore. And instead, I wiped my eyes and continued to let him serenade me. He smiled at me and stopped.

"Don't stop." I lightly sniffled and didn't care that I probably seemed all child like. In that moment, I knew what kind of love they say was worth fighting for, ours was that love. And to think I almost let him go. Looking at him, in front of me, fighting for me to let him back in, a lovesick grin fighting the urge to spread over his lips, my heart melted and I fell all over again.

"Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled, for my darling, I love you, and I always will." He slowly finished the song then slung the guitar over his back, scooting closer to me, he took my hands in his and gave me the saddest face I had ever seen him wear. "Please believe me. Please Jen. I honestly didn't kiss her, just give me a chance. Say you forgive me…"

I leaned forward and quickly pecked his lips. I didn't give him a long time to debate what that meant. "I'm sorry, I knew that it wasn't your fault but I was hurt and… I'm sorry." I quickly kissed him again.

"I'm sorry. Jen, I honestly don't know what happened, she said you two had made plans and that you were on your way, I had no idea." He held tightly to my hands as if I would slip right through them.

"I know. I don't blame you. I love you Colin." I kissed him once more, my hands pulling away only to run across the nape of his neck.

"I love you Jen. More than anything." He kissed me again. "More than myself." He kissed me again. "More than the world." He kissed me again. "More than…"

"I get it. Now can we go home?"

The point of telling you all of that was it helped us to never have a fight again. And if we let things get messed up, it wasn't nothing a song for the other couldn't fix. So to bring it back to where we were before, so even though he knew not talking to him was only a joke, that didn't stop me from dragging him into the living room, from pushing him on the couch, grabbing the guitar and sitting on the table in front of him.

I crossed my legs and smiled. "This goes out to my one and only love." I winked at him and he couldn't hide the blush from his cheeks. "Baby if I made you mad for something I might have said, please, let's forget the past, the future looks bright ahead. Don't be cruel to a heart that's true. I don't want no other love, baby it's just you I'm thinking of." He lightly laughed and went to reach for the guitar but I kept playing, a smile plastered on my face. "Don't stop thinking of me, don't make me feel this way, come on over here and love me, you know what I want you to say. Don't be cruel to a heart that's true. Why should we be apart? I really love you baby, cross my heart." I stopped to cross my heart and he reached for me, not letting go this time. I couldn't help but giggle when he removed the guitar and his lips playfully suckled my neck. My arms wrapped around him so easily and it is like that for us, so easily to mend things and for us to stay so in love. But with Colin, I find that life in general is a lot easier. He makes love a truly wonderful place to live in.


End file.
